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A COLLECTION OF CHARACTERS THAT YOU MAY FIND IN BARS, PUBS AND CLUBS. BROUGHT TO LIFE WITH SHORT TALES AND HUMOUROUS POETRY BY DAMIEN BAILEY AND COMICAL ILLUSTRATIONS BY ADAM WILLIS.

Tales of a Bar Tender

Inspired by a simple question "have you finished your book yet?" which was asked after a bar patron looked out upon the rest of the bar and witnessed: crass behaviour, crazy dancing, weird interactions with the opposite sex, the downright creepy, etc. It was a good question; why not document it?

Each week (or each fortnight (or each month (or whenever))) we plan to bring you a new tale that brings to life these strange creatures through the medium of humourous description and poetry, colourful illustrations and dance.

Text inspired by the frank and sometimes harsh poetry of John Cooper Clarke and Hovis Presely, and more importantly living in Glasgow. Illustrations inspired by whatever inspires a young graphic designer!

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  • DAMIEN BAILEY

    WRITER

    Damien was born at an unspecified time on Baekdu Mountain which was foretold by a swallow, and heralded by the appearance of a double rainbow across the sky over the mountain and a new star in the heavens.

    Unfortunately a retarded child was also born that day on the same site and was heralded as the future Dear Leader.

    Damien then adventured North to Scotland (just off the coast of England) and studied Mathematics at St Andrews University. After a short spell teaching the wondrous subject he came to the realisation that he hated children and left the profession.

    He now spends his time writing about technology and detailing the ‘colourful’ people you meet in bar tending. He hopes that one day he will return to lead his people as the true Dear Leader to which he’ll probably give up doing a year later…

  • BY THEIR POWERS COMBINED

    (EXCEPT HEART, THE FAKE ONE)

    They create the stories and images behind Scotland’s 37th most popular blog regarding the weird and wonderful characters you may bump into whilst drinking or even working in bars and pubs around the world!

  • ADAM WILLIS

    ILLUSTRATOR

    Adam is a graphic design student and creator of the rather unique illustrations here at Tales of a Bar Tender. He is rather mad about illustrating, and has an impressive array of various freelance experience including t-shirt design and print, advertising and brochure layout, logo-design and web graphics.

    If you ever need something designed, or alternatively just need to evoke your overwhelming love for his hideous drawings, feel free to drop him an email found at the bottom of this site.

    You can also check Adam out on Twitter @adambewillis, Facebook, or look at his impressive online portfolio.

Below is a collection of our top 12 tales (well not quite 12 yet).

We hope you enjoy them and encourage you to comment and share them using the links provided within each tale.

Damien also write articles, reviews and guides on other websites such as Mobot and Freedom Mobiles.

I post my other work here as links to the other blogs, I hope they are of use!

E-Mail // Damien Bailey

E-Mail // Adam Willis